Re: A very OP Christmas Part 1...

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:22 am

Alex doesn't blink and continues to speak softly.

Alex: Sweetie..... you can't give birth in your clothes..... I have to do this.

He grabs a pair of scissors and starts snipping away at Lexi's clothes.

Pockets Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:25 am

Alexis tries to pull off her pants.

Alexis: I can undress myself!

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:27 am

Alex backs away holding his hands up.

Alex: OK honey.... let me know if you need any help.

He takes this moment to grab the robe.

Pockets Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:29 am

Alexis continues to awkwardly struggle with her clothes... looking a little like an upside-down turtle.

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:31 am

Alex very quickly.... almost ninja-like sneaks in and unbuttons Lexi's pants to help her.

Jabberwocky Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:32 am

Somewhere in the room, a phone starts to ring

Pockets Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:36 am

Alexis looks almost grateful.

Alexis: Than.... OW!

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:38 am

Alex looks at Lexi.

Alex: Will you please let me help you now sweetie? I promise I'll be gentle......

Ewan picks up the phone and sounds almost frantic.

Ewan: Hello?

Pockets Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:40 am

Alexis: I guess....

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:44 am

Alex: Thank you honey.....

Alex slowly and delicately helps Alexis get undressed and into her robe.

.....OK sweetie.... I'm going to take you into the bathroom now.... and we can get started...... is that OK?

Pockets Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:46 am

Alexis almost whimpers.

Alexis: ...ow

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:51 am

Alex strokes Lexi's hair.

Alex: Look at me sweetie..... I'll be right next to you the whole time....... I'm not going anywhere.....

He gently picks her up.

Amanda appears in the bathroom wearing the whiite bikini Jillian provided.

Jabberwocky Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:51 am

The sound of an engine rapidly shifting gears is heard. Ashley speaks, his voice frantic and petrified

Ashley:"Ewan, it's Ash-OH GOD WATCH OUT!!-...Ashley...we're on our way I 'OLY SHITE BOY!!"

Colin (laughing):"Dad it's fine. I know what I'm doing."

Ashley:"Yer aiming to get us killed Colin!"

Colin:"Dad, your about to become a grandpa, I'm about to become an uncle. You really think I'm going to let us-OH CRAP-"

The screeching of brakes is heard....silence....

Colin:"...Hahaa oh man that was close.."

Ashley:"I'm 'aving a 'eart attack, I swear..."

Colin:"Oh get a grip...Hey dad can you light this smoke for me?"

Ashley:"Wot? No, pull over and do it. Better yet pull over and I'll drive."

Colin:"Nah we're making good time. I'll light it mysel-"

Ashley:"GET BOTH 'ANDS ON THE FECKIN WHEEL!!"

Colin:"Either you light it for me, or I light it myself. Either way the car ain't stopping."

Ashley:"...Ewan?...I'll call back if I feel the need to. Be there soon. One of us will anyways."

the call ends

Cruel Britannia Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:59 am

Ewan: Hmmmmn.... probably should have just let it be a surprise when they got here......

He puts the phone down...

Pockets Thu Dec 29, 2011 4:42 pm

Alex suddenly gets a very wet surprise. Alexis looks at him a bit sheepishly.

Alexis: Sorry ab... ow... t that....

Downstairs, Moira and Ben have arrived, and noticed the door had been left a little open. Moira pokes her head through the doorway, and notices the Nativity figurines strewn about.

Moira: 'Ello...?

Cruel Britannia Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:31 pm

Alex: No apologies necessary angel.

Alex successfully gets Lexi to the bathroom. Ewan sees Moira and Ben arrivie and greets them looking very flustered.

Ewan: Oh um..... hi...... glad you guys could..... make it.

Cryonix Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:50 pm

Gabe: ABANDON ALL HOPE, YE WHO ENTER HERE! IT'S LIKE THE HANGOVER WITH PLACENTA JOKES!

Pockets Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:50 pm

Moira stares at Ewan for a moment.

Moira: Wot did we miss?

Cruel Britannia Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:53 pm

Ewan: Um..... you're kinda about to be a grandma.

A stream of unrepeatable obscenities can be heard from a female voice upstairs followed by the name Gabe.

Pockets Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:54 pm

Moira: Jus' 'ow "about to" are we talkin' about 'ere?

Cryonix Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:55 pm

Gabe: Let me put it in layman's terms.....

SET FORTY ONE....THREE NINETY TWO.....DOWN SET......HIKE!

Pockets Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:57 pm

Moira stares up the stairs... then stares back at Ewan.

Moira: Oh... shite....

Cruel Britannia Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:59 pm

Ewan: On the twelfth day of Christmas my daughter in law gave to me.......

Alex: Jay..... I'm a little busy.... smack Gabe upside his head for me?

Pockets Thu Dec 29, 2011 9:01 pm

Moira: ... it ain't even that far... 'ow's she doin'?

Cruel Britannia Thu Dec 29, 2011 9:02 pm

Ewan looks around.

Ewan: She's throwing Biblical figures.......

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