Re: The Saints' Locker Room

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 4:32 am

Janitor: It's a fairly simple question....does your perfectly shaped, created by workout and butter ass.....

...have dimples?

Cruel Britannia Sat Feb 04, 2012 9:12 am

Suddenly, the following can be heard.....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ileMBlAqKw

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 7:36 pm

Colin rushes to the door and looks out into the hallway. He quickly closes the door, locking it and playing everything not bolted down in front of the door

Colin:"If those people out there singing and throwing confetti around with "Saints" banners are your doing, I swear..."

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 9:33 pm

Janitor: Well...I was lonely...and they loved you guys too! So we started the 'Touch each other to the Saints' fan club!

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 9:37 pm

Colin:...."I immediately regret blocking my escape..."

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 9:46 pm

Janitor: No don't! It's great! We base our positions on you guys! We have 'Micah getting the shaft from Alexis', 'Colin's ...tug... of emotions', 'Alex and Mandy's twincest cannon', and 'drizzling caramel'!

Cruel Britannia Sat Feb 04, 2012 9:58 pm

Outside a priest can be heard.

Priest: And on this, the eve of the holy sex cocoon.... let us nourish ourselves with the sacred Taquitos....

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:05 pm

Colin:"....tug of...emotions?....yea that sounds about right...alright I'm going to go out the window now.....Wait taquitos?

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:08 pm

Janitor: Wait...you don't want to go out that window! Out there is the pool of protein! ...It's full of yogurt...I think.

...well...that's what she said....

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:12 pm

Colin:"She?"

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:18 pm

Janitor: Yes, she. The one that has put this all together. She is you guys' biggest fan. Even bigger than me!...don't let that fool you though. I grow in proportion to the closeness of the Saints.

He moves closer to Colin...

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:21 pm

Colin:"Who is she?"

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:21 pm

Janitor: Her name is Pat. Did you want to meet her?

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:23 pm

Colin clenches his teeth

Colin:"Yes..."

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:29 pm

Janitor: YOU WOULD! GREAT! One...one second.

The janitor runs to Colin's old locker and starts to strip. He puts on a very bad costume and makeup....turning into this....

The Saints' Locker Room - Page 5 Pat2-742146

The Saints' Locker Room - Page 5 Pat2-742146

JanitorPat: WELL.......hello, you tall bottle of mansyrup....

Jabberwocky Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:32 pm

Colin:"...Of course..."

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:35 pm

JanitorPat: I know...this life has been...hard...for you. It's been such a...turgid....climb. Let me...help you tug on your...large emotional chord. I have a backdrop that looks like Edmonton, if that would help make this less....weird...

Cruel Britannia Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:36 pm

Priest: BRING OUT THE MOOSE!

Cryonix Sat Feb 04, 2012 10:37 pm

(Knuckles...)

Jabberwocky Sun Feb 05, 2012 4:14 am

Colin:"How about this...you help me get out of this...sorry excuse for a bad twilight zone story...and I'll bring the rest of the Saints."

Cryonix Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:36 am

JanitorPat: ....You...you will?!?!? I've always wanted to oogle Alex. Hmmm....how do I know you're not lying.

Jabberwocky Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:41 am

Colin:"Because I'm the emotional caring one, always wanting to find a balance of peace even when its unattainable by my definition."

Cryonix Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:44 am

JanitorPat: Is this the legendary resentment/respect of the Edwards? I've always wanted to see this up close! Honestly....just so I know....why do you feel you must champion your dad still? Isn't he happy...like...getting married again and stuff?

Jabberwocky Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:53 am

Colin clears his throat

Colin:"Look, when I pen my autobiography, I will send you a copy."

Cryonix Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:55 am

JanitorPat: .....cockpromise?

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